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| LifeTime
Volume 13 Issue 2 ==========
Working Teen? Consider This By Kirk Bloir, Ohio State University Extension Associate for Human Development and Family Science
At some point most parents will have to decide if they are going to allow their teen to get a job. In fact, half of all teens start their first job around age 12 and continue to work year-round. By the time they graduate from high school, most teens (more than 80 percent) will have worked a number of years in a part-time job (20 hours a week or less). Many spend their money on entertainment, car expenses, clothing, school activity fees, saving for college, and even helping contribute to the family fund -- groceries, home repairs, etc.
With so many teens working, it has to be a good thing, right? Well, that depends. According to research, working has both positive and negative effects on teens. For many, the benefits include the opportunity to:
-- Obtain valuable work experiences.
-- Learn time management skills.
-- Form good work habits.
-- Learn how to effectively manage finances.
-- Gain useful, marketable skills.
-- Become financially independent.
However, the negative consequences of teen employment may outweigh the positives. The main pitfalls include:
-- Less time on homework. Working students may not have or make the time to complete their work.
-- More classroom deviant activity and less academic effort. Working students may cheat, copy assignments, or cut classes to compensate for time spent on the job rather than on school assignments.
-- Higher rates of absenteeism and less school involvement. Employment may place constraints on the student's study and sleep time. Fatigue or lack of preparation for the day's academic activities may discourage the working teen from going to school, and a job may take the place of extracurricular activities.
-- Lower grades in school. Students who work more than 20 hours a week have grade point averages that are lower than other students who work 10 or less hours a week.
-- Less time with family. Employment has an impact on relationships within the family because it reduces the amount of time spent with parents and siblings.
-- More likely to use drugs and alcohol. Substance abuse is higher for workers than for non-workers and for students who work more hours (20 or more).
-- Development of negative views of work itself. Early entry into a negative or harsh work environment may encourage negative views of work.
The more hours teens work, the more prone they are to experience these negative effects.
Adapted from the Ohio State University Extension fact sheet FLM-FS-8-01, "Adolescent Employment" by Urvia McDowell and Ted G. Futris. Available on-line at: http://ohioline.osu.edu/flm01/pdf/FS08.pdf
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Does Your Teen Want to Get a Job? How to Help By Kirk Bloir, Ohio State University Extension Associate for Human Development and Family Science
Before your teen starts working, or even if they are working now, there are several important topics you both need to discuss. Having a job is a big responsibility, and like any other part of life, it will bring its own fair share of stresses, trials, tribulations, as well as rewards.
Here are a few of the topics you and your teen should discuss with the goal being to help ease the stress they feel as they try to juggling school, work, and family life:
-- First, sit down with your teen and openly discuss his or her reasons for wanting a job. Explain the responsibilities associated with having a job while in high school.
-- Create a daily or weekly schedule with your teen that highlights the time that they spend working and the time they spend on homework and other school-related activities. Remember that work may be beneficial if the number of hours worked per week is 15 or less.
-- Set up family time periodically. This could be once a week or month and is a time where you and your teen get reacquainted through quality interactions such as conversations, game playing, or family outings.
-- Teach your teen practical ways to manage adverse situations on their jobs as well as in school.
-- Come to a consensus about how you expect your teen to use his or her income. Will they be helping out with family finances? Would you like them to begin saving for college? Reaching a consensus will help to avoid later conflicts about money.
Teach your teen effective ways to manage the many demands that are made on their time. As they move closer to adulthood it will be necessary to manage many demanding roles as their responsibilities increase. This is a good time to learn how to use their time and resources wisely.
Most importantly, be supportive.
Adapted from the Ohio State University Extension fact sheet FLM-FS-8-01, "Adolescent Employment" by Urvia McDowell and Ted G. Futris. Available on-line at: http://ohioline.osu.edu/flm01/pdf/FS08.pdf
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Family Meals: A Food Fight or Quality Time?
By Dan Remley, Family and Consumer Sciences Agent for Ohio State University Extension in Butler County
According to the newsletter Thriving from University of Missouri Extension, the more children participate in family meals, the less likely they will smoke, drink, use drugs, become depressed, or drop out of school. In the newsletter article "Make Mealtime Family Time," author Lynda Zimmerman writes that families who eat together tend to have better communication, stronger family bonds, and better nutrition. Family meals are also a time for learning. Parents can teach children table manners, social skills, family values, a sense of community, and even basic cooking skills.
With all of the benefits of family meals, why don't more families eat together? Families with school-aged children especially tend to be extremely busy with extracurricular activities and hectic work schedules. The fact sheet "Say 'Yes' to Family Meals" from Iowa State University Extension suggests that scheduling in a couple nights a week for family meals can be extremely beneficial in the long- and short-run.
Another mealtime challenge are parent-child food battles. The benefits of family meals can only be realized if dinner conversations are pleasant. If mealtime is stressful and combative, not only will family members be less willing to participate, children could develop negative attitudes towards food. According to the Iowa State Extension fact sheet, parents should promote harmony and cooperation at the dinner table. Also, parents should check their own values and beliefs because they might not be health-promoting. For example, many adults believe that they have to clean their plates even if they are already full. Evelyn Tribole and Elyse Resch suggest in Intuitive Eating that this eating style contributes to the obesity epidemic. It is important that parents honor their children's hunger and fullness even though it may be inconvenient. It is much less stressful to put uneaten food in the refrigerator for later consumption than to fight with your child. Kids eat much more intuitively than adults do so perhaps they should be teaching us about knowing when to say, "I'm full."
We can set a good example, however, by serving healthy, balanced meals. If dealing with picky eaters, the American Dietetic Association's Complete Food and Nutrition Guide recommends serving at least one food that your child prefers but to also encourage them to try others. The guide also suggests that mixing healthy food groups with favorite foods can also be helpful, such as adding peas to macaroni and cheese. We can teach school-aged children about the principles of the food guide pyramid: moderation and variety. It is up to our children to decide what foods to eat or try and how much.
Adapted from:
Thriving Newsletter. Make Mealtime Family Time, Lynda Zimmerman University of Missouri Outreach and Extension, October 2002.
"Say 'Yes' to Family Meals," Iowa State University Extension, December 1999
Intuitive Eating. Evelyn Trobole and Elyse Resch. 1998. St Martin's Griffin Publishing. New York, New York
The American Dietetic Association's Complete Food and Nutrition Guide. Roberta Duyff. 1998. The American Dietetic Association.
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Consider This Before Registering for Summer Activities
By Joyce A. Shriner, Family and Consumer Sciences Agent for Ohio State University Extension in Hocking County
Spring is here and it is time to begin registering our children for summer camps and activities. But, before finalizing summer plans, consider this -- many well-meaning parents are hurting their children by giving them too much: too much money, too much freedom, too much protection, too much help, too many things, and too many activities.
Dan Kindlon, researcher and author of Too Much of A Good Thing, found that children who receive too much tend to develop behavior problems including: self-centeredness, anger, perfectionism, lack of motivation, eating disorders, problems with self-control, and acting spoiled. The challenge that parents face is to learn how to provide enough for their children without giving them too much. How can parents find a balance?
Fortunately, in their book How Much Is Enough?, Jean Clarke, Connie Dawson, and David Bredehoft identify four common clues to overindulgence. They are:
-- Does the situation hinder the child from learning the tasks that support his or her development and learning at this age?
-- Does the situation give a disproportionate amount of family resources to one or more of the children? (Resources can include money, space, time, energy, attention, and psychic input.)
-- Does this situation exist to benefit the adult more than the child?
-- Does the child's behavior potentially harm others, society, or the planet in some way?
A positive answer to any of the clues indicates a problem with overindulgence. The clues can be used as a guide to help parents make decisions about which summer activities are appropriate for their children and which are not.
To learn more about this topic, read the books referenced in this article or see the fact sheet titled "Indulging Our Children and Harming Them in the Process" on the Ohioline website: http://ohioline.osu.edu/flm03/FS09.pdf. The fact sheet is also available from the Ohio State University Extension Office in your county.
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Long-Distance Families
By Melinda J .Hill, Family and Consumer Sciences Agent for Ohio State University Extension in Wayne County
What if you didn't see your spouse for six months after you kissed good-bye this morning? Many families in our communities are facing this challenge with the military deployment. Research on over-the-road truck drivers and from the military share ways some couples make it work. See if any of the following examples might help your family or someone you know.
-- If you have time, plan ahead for major decisions that will need to be made while you or your partner is away. Discuss things like where to go for a problem with the car, how to shut off the hot water heater if it leaks, who to call when the furnace quits and other issues that you will need outside help with. Keep a notebook or journal with this information so you can find it when you need it.
-- Keep a folder at home of things to discuss. This year's vacation plans or the children's grade cards are examples of important details you will want to share.
-- Plan your phone calls or computer contact, if possible. With advance planning, outside activities can be done without waiting for the call.
-- When talking by phone, use the time to build up each other and gain understanding about what your roles really are. Acknowledge each other's commitment to making this situation work for everyone. The spouse left at home will need to become increasingly independent to manage the household, children, and outside work obligations.
-- Write frequently and even if it's a short note; try to include everyone in the family. Pick a day of the week to write and send notes. Having a schedule gives your loved one something to look forward to.
-- Keep a journal of activities at home, even if it's just a calendar on the kitchen counter to which everyone contributes. This way when you do talk on the phone, you can catch your partner up on the daily schedule.
-- Make plans for the homecoming. Use a calendar to mark the days and talk about what the expectations are. Does the returning partner want to be greeted by a small gathering or the whole family? Do you want a large party immediately, or would you prefer a day or two to regroup and then gather with family and friends? Be specific about what you want or expect so that anger or disappointment don t cloud your reunion. Plan favorite foods or music in your gathering. Include children too so they feel a part of this special time.
As the returning partner, it is important to support and acknowledge the way your spouse has kept things going. You may gradually make changes, but don't criticize or complain about how things were done. Don't expect to have the role you had before you left. Children have been disciplined, asked permission to do things, and their home routines have gone on without you. Respect the decisions that have been made during your absence and talk about issues with which you are not comfortable. |